Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Rocky and Bullwinkle
They were once the best of pals, but Rocky had a secret. Turns out he was a transspecies. Unhappy with his life as a rodent, Rocky went into therapy, and later sought medical help to become the human he always felt he was inside. It was an amazing success story! After years of torturous electrolysis, and massive doses of anabolic steroids, Rocky not only achieved his life long dream of becoming a human, but went on to become Heavyweight Champion of the World! He is now living in stealth, with his wife Adrian in Philadelphia. She knows nothing of his past life, as a cartoon squirrel.
Sadly, when Rocky became human, he could no longer relate to his old pal Bullwinkle. Bullwinkle always wanted to become human too, but there was that little problem with his antlers. They would always grow back, making it impossible for him the pass as a human. Rocky wanted nothing more to do with him, for fear that camaraderie with a lowly cartoon moose, would remind people of his past, and cast a pall over his marriage to Adrian. He was also afraid that once the news got out that he used to be a super flying squirrel, his boxing opponents would cry foul, and petition the boxing commission to strip him of his title.
At last notice, Bullwinkle was still in mourning over the loss of his old pal, and was seeking solace in friendship with Boris and Natasha, who had emigrated to the west after the fall of the Soviet Union. Although mere cartoon humans, Boris and Natasha turned out to be great fiends. Even though Bullwinkle found it impossible to permanently shed his antlers, they still accepted him as a human being, and a dear friend.
Rocky, before the change: